Dancing with Death

The other night we talked about death. We talked about our fears, our thoughts on what happens after our bodies have had enough of this world. We talked about what we believed this after world to look like. We talked about if we were afraid, if we would be ready, if there was anything at all to be ready for. Now, this may sound morbid, but why? Why does this topic always have to be so hush hush? I feel like it is viewed as this "do not enter" zone of conversation. But why can't we go in? Have a look around? Explore the inevitable? Why can't we learn more about this? Can't we learn to look at is as not this dreaded Ultimate End, but just simply as a part of life? Can't we focus on being prepared for the inevitable? Too many people are frightened to death of the unknown, but what good will that fear really do? Why not be excited for it? I'm not saying get out the calendar and start marking off the days until you're taking a dirt nap for the rest of eternity, but why not just pass in peace?

My intentions with death would be to die ready and non-remorseful. I guess I don't have much of a say in it. I will die when it is my time to die, but I want to make sure I truly and completely lived with every breath I was given and give every last breath to life. As I have written before--the true miracle is that we are even here in the first place. For the time being I will relish in that.

At this age it is somewhat of a strange thing to be thinking about, but I do wonder how people who know they are going to die really feel. And how they go about feeling peaceful. Knowing the people they left behind will be ok, knowing they have done all they could to make their lives and the lives around them full, knowing that it is just all part of the circle of life. I think that coming to grips and really harnessing that thought would be something that could potentially take your whole life just to conquer. Is anyone truly and completely ready? One of my friends said something that struck me deeply, what about the people we leave behind? How do you deal with that? Then I began thinking and a furious tangent of thoughts came to my head I was not able to push away. What if we regretted missing out on them? On their lives? On our relationship with them? On what we could have done for them? How could we ever feel ready to go in peace when we were sad about all of that? How could they let us go if they felt that way too? I guess that is why people cry at funerals. I guess that is why death is so profoundly tragic. Because so many people are so sure they will never see that person again. They will never feel what they felt around that person again. That is what makes you weep as their body--this body you have grown to love--is nothing but cold matter being put into the ground. But then, against what might feel like overwhelming odds, the strength of faith can press through. Faith is telling us that this body had really nothing to do with the person inside of it. Faith is telling us there is much more than what meets the eye. Sure, our bodies stand to tell what we have done or been through, but it doesn't have anything to do with your relationship with this person. At this point you can choose to know that's that. There is nothing else, you will never see them again, life will never be the same. Or you can choose to think that you know their spiritual self has gone on and that someday yours too will meet up with them. That this is not the end of the road, it is just a part of the road. Free will is one of our many wonderful traits as human beings, so I guess that is just one of the things that you use it for. To go on or not. I say, whatever helps you sleep at night. Believe what you want, I'm not one to judge. All I know is that the relationships we make on this earth could possibly determine them for after this earth. For the white marshmallow land as I like to envision it. I also think that just because some believe that relationships might go on past our time on planet Earth doesn't mean time should be wasted just because you think there might be endless amounts of it. There's my advice of the day. Use your free will to do what you want with that.

All this death talk makes me want to have a good old fashioned dance party. There's nothing like feeling alive after a dance party! Now that I have my very own apartment I can dance all day. It's amazing I haven't taken full advantage of that yet. Well, looks like I know what I'll be doing Friday afternoon! TGIF!