2009. What? I was just getting ready for the turn of the millennium and now it's almost a decade later. I am starting to feel old.
Which actually isn't that far off the theme for this week: my birthday! Where I will surely be turning another year old and most definitely another year wiser (not an arguable point). Looking back to one year ago I cannot believe how fast it has gone, yet I cannot believe everything that has happened in just 12 months. If you would have told me I would be where I am today one year ago I would have eyed you skeptically and then thought you were weird for coming up and telling me my future. And don't even get me started on what I would have done when it came true! You freak.
So yes, here I am on the other side of the world trying to make sense of it all. And failing miserably. I am sitting in my small apartment with nothing but the sound of the keyboard rattling away, and I wonder, what the hell did I get myself into this time? Initially I thought it was way more than I could swallow. But when you take smaller bites it all goes down nice and smooth. So that's what I have been doing and it's gotten me this far. I'm still alive! What a miracle.
My brain activity has not just slowed down lately, it has come to a ugly and unpleasant stop. It's kinda just slowed down and then crashed and burned into a pile of old Japanese trash (the burnable trash--it's not recyclable matter anyhow). So with a new year comes new goals and yadda yadda yadda. But digging deeper has never really been on the menu for the year's feast, but somehow I find myself parched of something thick. So it looks like I know what to order. Now, how to create it is another matter altogether. Too bad I don't have my own personal cook. I can't even think about that because then I get all excited and for what? Nothing. Because at the end of the day it's me, my skillet and some cold salmon. Quite literally. And in other words, me, my thoughts, my observations and the missing glue that is supposed to link them together. In some mysterious way.
Well here I go again, making no sense, not even to myself. I guess what I am trying to say that instead of venturing across the globe to find the answers I have ventured and found nothing but mountains of questions. Mountains I tell you! And no answers for miles. I am really on a roll with these metaphors tonight. Although, ideally you would want them to make sense...I'll work on that.
Well it's January folks and it is cold. Which is not something new for January, unless of course you are from somewhere like Australia and then it is usually 30 Celsius and you are going to the beach...But yes, cold. So I am used the the cold. Being a Colorado native I actually thrive in the cold. I enjoy skiing, I am warm blooded--ok I know--HOT blooded. I get hella hot fast. Ask anyone! They will agree. So even though I am from a cold place, I don't LIVE in a cold place. We turn the heat on, we wear jackets, we drink hot cocoa, we enjoy the warmth of warm. So that is why I realized I am not cut out for cold. The Japanese haven't quite figured out insulation in housing, so if you aren't closing off rooms and blasting the heat (which isn't really true heat), then it is as cold in your apartment as it is outside. Needless to say when I venture to any other part of my apartment I put on my gloves, another jacket, pull my sarf tighter and put on my headband. It's not really a comfortable living situation. I can't really say this is complaining though, it's just how it is I guess. The complaining will come when it's hot, that I can guarentee. You will never hear the end of it. Because there is always a way to get warm (well, usually) but when you are hot and you want to cool down...good freaking luck.
Anyway, it's cold and I don't like it. Besides the miserable cold, the teaching is just about the same. Friends on the other hand are wonderful as always and I am looking forward to future adventures with them. Looking way ahead I am beyond excited for this summer. And looking back I had an amazing time in Thailand and my adventures thoughout Japan. A truly beautiful experience.
Well it's late so I am going to hit the futon. Next time I write I will be 23! Ah!
And I hope I make more sense when I am 23.
Goodnight.
